Guess the old guy was right, huh? Hermes, I mean. Day I met him, he told me we all fuck it up eventually. Never figured it was that hard to avoid, til tonight. I mean, you hear people talk about it all the time, you feel it sometimes when an Obrimos starts tossing celestial fire around, but it doesn’t really hit home til you’re standing in a factory full of Seer wackjobs with the fuckin Minister of Paternoster himself watching while the Abyss plays voyeur outside and places bets on your chances of survival.
Made myself so focused on the job, getting in and out, keeping myself from pulling the trigger…just wasn’t thinking about it. Never really had to before. Nothing M taught me ever gets the Abyss’ attention, didn’t realize how fast it can sneak up on you, jesus. Well, I got the fuckin picture now, you better believe. Sure would love to know what the hell happened to the manifestation, it was gone by the time we got out to the parking lot. Odoya claims there’s no way this Weyland asshole would’ve done anything with it. Funny timing for being uninvolved, and you never know what an archmage’s gonna be capable of, but I dunno…something doesn’t sit quite right about it. Only people I know of who might know enough about the Abyss to just eat paradox like that are the Scelesti, so unless Paternoster’s got more problems than we even thought, it kinda seems like something else was going on there. …God, here’s hoping the deals with the Hollow haven’t started up already. I’d test it but it sounds like a fuckin stupid idea to stick your hand in front of the wolf’s jaws just to see if it’s gonna bite you, at least when the fabric of fuckin reality’s at stake.
Makes me sick to think about what they did to that kid. I cannot fuckin believe Artemis wants to keep that piece of shit artifact around. I don’t care if the Mysterium’s safehouse is on the goddamn moon, that thing is an abomination and the fewer of them there are in the world the better…but it might be worth giving it to her anyway. Think Rhi won’t be feeling too negotiable about it though. We’ll see what happens.
Anyway, I don’t know enough about master level bullshit yet to know for sure whether anything of that kid’s consciousness could’ve been recovered, but I doubt it. His mind was completely wiped. Just like that future Sleeper. Death was probably the best anybody could’ve given him. …I’m glad it wasn’t me though. Even the vampires never told me to whack a kid. If they had I think I would’ve done it, how fucked up is that. Don’t pat yourself on the back too hard, is what my daimon’s thinking right now, you think one decision makes up for everything else? What do you want, a cookie? Yeah yeah, don’t get your damn panties in a twist, I’m working on it. At least I don’t have to lie to Rhiannon when I tell her I didn’t shoot him.
I gotta start working on Mind again, when I got a minute to breathe. All this fuckin despicable mental atrocity we keep seeing…makes me want to put blood on my hands over it, but it’d be better to figure out how to fix it too. Besides, it sucks having to keep telling the girls there’s nothing I can do. Ha ha, too bad all the Mastigos mentors I ever had are crazy fucks who’ll want me dead any day now. I guess when you put people on the Path of Scourging eventually they either come out enlightened or they learn to be monsters, one or the other.