Legion. This is some seriously fucked up shit. Can’t help feeling like the only good way to deal with these bastards is to put a bullet in every one of their skulls. That’s instinct talking. …no, instinct and common fuckin sense. But so help me God if it’s the last thing I do, I’m gonna redeem that Seer shithead. Cure his psychotic disease and make him get it. I need to do it. If I do it, it’ll be proof that I can be a force for real justice in this hellhole world, that my daimon was right about me and I’m meant for more than blood, no matter how good the blood feels.
Maybe Dahhak’ll have something to say about it. If there’s anybody in this whole damn universe who’ll get it and can beat some ideas into me, it’s him. …and maybe he can tell me whether I got any corruption in my subconscious that I can’t find. Wonder what happens to the daimon in a Legion-infected mind? Does it fall first or last? Does it fight back? I’ve read that daimons don’t see themselves as protectors of the Oneiros, but its job is to question you so you’ll take a closer look at yourself…it’s gotta know something’s wrong when it all starts, right? Hm.
I’m just glad Rhi finally got the picture. What we’d have to do if she kept using the masques that way…I mean, maybe someday she’d learn how to do it like Leto did but she sure as fuck ain’t ready for it now, and frankly I don’t think she’d like who she became if she did learn. I wouldn’t. Jesus, I need to be careful. The more I fall in love with her the worse it’s gonna be if some asshole finds out and uses it against us. …could turn it off, but hell, she’s the best thing to ever happen to me, and I don’t want to do that to her. Not like that.
…she said she was proud of me. Dunno what to say about that. Felt like somebody pushing open a curtain and letting the sun in or something.
Even with all the rest of this, though, there’s something nagging at me. There’s gotta be justice for this city, for all the shit she’s been through. Nobody’s paid for this, nobody’s had to face up to it. Grimnir, his buddies, they’re not responsible, not really. Complicit, but not responsible. Convenient and satisfying to take it out on them, but real justice ain’t about those things. Trouble is, the only one I can legit point my gun at here is fuckin Weyland, or Velentr or whatever the hell his name is. How do you bring an archmaster to justice? How do you even learn enough to know what he deserves? Well, I know one thing. If he’s allowed to destroy the Ladder, the world is fucked. And anybody willing to fuck the world probably deserves everything we can throw at him.
I just don’t know how to make that enough.